Single for Christmas

I've noticed that for some reason people like to be single in summer, but have someone in winter. Probably saves on heating bills. But I'm here to tell you that you don't need to man/woman for the holidays, being single is just as good.

1. SAVE ON PRESENTS - you don't have to buy presents for that special someone. You don't even have to think about buying presents for them. You don't have spend ages trying to guess what they want, or think about if you're even doing presents, nor how much you should spend on them.

2. YOU CAN KISS WHO YOU LIKE - waiting around the mistletoe is something that has to be done. You have the mystery of not knowing who you'll bump into under there. Plus, when the clock strikes twelve at midnight on new years eve you can kiss whoever you would like, within reason of course.

Throw on some tinsel & sequins and enjoy yourself

3. NO AWKWARD FAMILY MEETINGS - you don't have to hang around awkwardly at your boyfriend/girlfriend's house whilst all of their family gather and exchange presents. You don't have to make small talk with people that you've never met before, or just sit there silently like an extra piece to a jigsaw puzzle whilst they go through their Christmas traditions.

4. YOU CAN SPEND TIME WITH YOUR OWN FAMILY - Christmas is a time for family and now you can spend some quality time with your family, on your own. You can play some board games and stuff your face with Christmas food without having to play host to someone the entire time and having to make sure that they're entertained. Plus, you don't miss out on time with them, because  you can stay at home the entire time.

5. YOU CAN BE SELFISH - you don't have to share your chocolates with anyone. Or your presents.

6. ALONE TIME IS GOOD TIME - if there's any-time to be alone, Christmas is the best time. Christmas isn't exactly a lonely time, so being single at Christmas isn't too bad. In fact, it's probably the best time for you to be single. You can keep yourself busy, and surround yourself with friends and family, plus it's acceptable for you to stuff your face and eat an entire terry's chocolate orange in an hour.

The Future

The usual conversation that will follow from someone asking me what I study, is what I then intend to do with my degree, and the answers is always the same; I don't know what I want to do after uni.

In first year it wasn't really a big deal, and maybe it still isn't now, but being halfway through my degree already I do sometimes think that I need to get a move on. When I was in sixth form I had several ideas about what I wanted to do at university, and now I'm at university I have several ideas of what I'd like to do after university, but they're just ideas, and I'm so indecisive.

When I listen to other people talking about law conversion courses, teacher training and placements, it actually makes me feel a little bit ill. I know that there are things that I should be looking in to, in order to help me to decide, but I can't even decide on them. It's terrible. Googling what to do with my life hasn't helped much either - I wouldn't recommend google for drastic life decisions.

Not even slightly helpful

Currently, I have about three or four ideas floating around in my head, but I wouldn't have said I'm very sure of any of them. As a person who always has to be organised and plans things months in advance, not knowing makes me incredibly anxious. It's not that I'm not driven - I want to go and do things with my life, it's that I don't know what I want to do. Most people I know have dreams that they want to go into a certain career, or work with children/animals, or just make lots of money. I know I'll have to make money, but doing what?

I think perhaps the problem might be to do with the number of people who aren't getting the jobs they want when they leave university. Or a job at all, in fact. I know that there are people who have not only worked a lot harder than me, but actually are a lot cleverer than me, and I'll have to compete with them for jobs. That's scary stuff. If you've ever seen the TV programme 'drifters' then you'll know what my fears are. Ending up back at my old part-time holiday job full-time whilst stuck living at home.

All I know right now is that I don't fancy doing a postgraduate degree, three years at university (and £27,000 in fees) is enough for me.

Date a Mate

It's the traditional storyline of at least 40% of romcoms; the female lead runs around with a whole lotta' terrible men and is sworn off love forever, before realising that she's actually in love with her best friend, who's been in love with her the whole time. The poor guy has been rolling around in the friendzone for a while, a territory that I'm sure a lot of you guys would recognise.
 But, actually, it's true, dating a friend is one of the best things you can do... Here are 6 reasons why:

1. THEY KNOW YOUR WORST. They've seen you at your best, as well as at your very worst, and they're still attracted to you. You don't have to keep up the false pretence that you're flawless 24/7 because they've already seen you in sweats and a hoodie, in desperate need of a shower, and they still think you're fit.

Come at me boys

2. YOU KNOW YOU CAN TRUST THEM. You guys already had no secrets, and you already trusted one another with your lives. Trust is a big part of a relationship, and knowing you can fully, 100% trust them because you already did makes things plain sailing. You guys can share more than just secrets, with confidence.

3. YOU FAMILY ALREADY LOVES THEM. No awkward introductions here, they've been coming round to your house for years and your mum was already in love with them. Your siblings get along with them better than you get along with your own siblings, and they've managed to charm their way into your family's hearts already, even your dog loves them. Plus, your mum had already planned the wedding, she just didn't tell you.

4. YOUR FRIENDS LOVE THEM TOO. Yeah, at first they'll think it's a little bit weird, but they've been trying to get you two together for years. They always thought you were perfect for one another, and your friends love them just as much as you do. Therefore, having you both together is the dream they've been waiting for.

5. THEY KNOW YOUR RELATIONSHIP HISTORY. They know who your first kiss was, and the embarrassing story about your 'first time'. They know that you had your heartbroken and you've broken many in return. They've watched you go through arguments and relationship fights, and they've been there for you when you needed them, so they know how to not go wrong. They'll treat you right.

They are always supportive of your mistakes, and help to guide you in the right direction, even if it's by using playful force

6. EVERYONE ALWAYS TELLS YOU TO MARRY YOUR BEST FRIEND. When you date someone that person becomes like a best friend to you anyway. You guys have just skipped a step, why waste time, this way is so much more efficient. You guys both know that you get along so well, so you needn't worry about that. You're both into the same things and could talk for hours on end. No awkward first date moments here, perfect.

Checking Your Boobs

This probably sounds like a really weird thing to write a blog post on, but it's important, so why not write about it.

Over two years ago, when I was 17-years old, I found a lump in one of my breasts. It was a pretty sizeable thing and I'm not going to lie - I panicked. I think finding something like that is something that you know could happen to you, but you don't expect to happen to you, and it was scary.

I headed to my GP and she sent me to a local hospital and to their breast clinic where they took an ultrasound, a biopsy and told me that they thought it was a fibroadenoma.

Fibroadenomas are non-cancerous, benign lumps made out of fibrous breast tissue. They're pretty common, especially in young women, but can occur at any age. So, my practitioner told me not to panic, but that they did want to remove the lump because it was so big. A few months later I went in for surgery. They removed the lump under general anaesthetic and I was able to go home later that same day. I have been left with a small scar, but the surgeon was clever and managed to mostly hide it.

If you're well enough to instagram, you can't be that sick.

Why am I telling you all this? Well, I think it highlights the importance of knowing your own body and making sure you do check it from time to time for any abnormalities. Also, I think there is a culture among young people to just assume that because they are young they are also healthy. This case might not be the best example because fibroadenomas are benign, but any abnormalities in your breasts could indicate something wrong - so get it checked out!

Boys this goes for you too. If you notice something that you don't think is quite right just pop to your GP and get an opinion from a health professional. Don't feel embarrassed, it is much better safer than sorry!

Birmingham, in the Holiday Season

This will be my second Christmas season spent in the beautiful Birmingham. Once university breaks up for Christmas in December I head home, but before that there are plenty of festive things to do out & about in Birmingham to get you in the mood.

The Frankfurt/German Market. If you go into the centre of town around Christmas time this one is hard to avoid. All along New Street from the station to the Bullring stalls are set up selling festive goods such as food, drink and chocolate. It can get really busy in the evenings, so try and get there early, but it's one not to miss. It's open now and will remain open until 22nd December everyday 10am-9pm!

The Ice Rink in Centenary Square. As part of the festive activities there's also an ice rink and big wheel put up just outside of the ICC/Library on Broad Street. The Ice Rink is open from 10am-10pm everyday until the 4th January and has varying ticket prices according to whether it's peak or off-peak, but they do offer a discount for students.

The Bullring. Festive shopping is one of the best kinds of shopping, I always think. The Bullring gets into the Christmas spirit early and is full of lights and decorations. The shops themselves are beautifully festive and if you go on a weekday it should be less busy. Both selfridges and debenhams, at both ends of the bullrings, have tons of decorations up already and just wandering around either of them will gives you loads of gift ideas.. or if you're like me, way more things to add to your wishlist!

If you're broke and can't afford to spend a whole lotta' money on festive food, drink and fun then you only have to walk around the town centre to see the beautiful Christmas lights, for free! 

Feminism

I am probably not the best qualified for writing on a subject such as feminism but I've found that it is a topic which has become much more important to me since beginning university. It's probably a term that you have come across before, but will find being used more frequently now you are at uni. 

Feminism means different things to different people, this is something I have learnt. Like most terms, its meaning has changed with the society in which it has been used in, and it means something different now than it did 20 or so years ago. I would refer to feminism as the movement for the equality of the sexes. This means that if you refer to yourself as a "feminist" you believe that both sexes should be equal to one another, in all areas.

Dapper Laughs has been in trouble recently, with ITV dropping his show due to public complaints over him being sexist.

It's not hard to understand why we need feminism. The wage gap, and number of women in high powered jobs, shows the difference between men and women in the workplace, but there are many other areas in which one could say that women and men are treated differently. Feminists often call for a thing called the patriarchy to be brought down. A patriarchy refers to a society run by men for the needs of men. They believe that we live under double standards and unfair expectations because of the perceived difference between men and women. 

Feminists don't have to be female. They can be of any sexuality. They don't have to believe that women are better than men, only that we are, and should be treated as, equal. (This is something I have come across a lot too, people thinking that feminism means hating men. That's not the case at all. If feminism was about hating men that would make feminism about men... It's not. It's about equality).

If you are interested in why feminism is important the web is a great place the start. There are lots of twitter accounts, Facebook pages, websites and blogs which speak about feminism and can help you learn even more. "@EverydaySexism" documents, via tweets, sexual harassment & assault experienced by everyday normal women, helping women to know they're not alone. You've probably all been catcalled or had someone slap your bum, @EverydaySexism tweets other womens experiences, and your own (just @ them or #everydaysexism). "Whoneedsfeminism.com" asks exactly that. They take in submissions from people all around the world voicing their reason for needing feminism. 

These are two great web pages to start looking at if you are interested, want to know more or have a question which has gone unanswered.

Finally, although these are the things that I have come to learn about my perceived feminism, feminism can be a very personal and individual thing. Just like other things in the world, not everyone believes the exact same thing. Although the basis and premise may be similar, there are many branches and different ideologies, just like anything else. Bare that in mind when reading anything or speaking to anyone. It can be a case of opinion, so don't be discouraged if someone does not wholly agree with you, or has a different idea altogether.

What's on my iPhone?

I've had my iPhone 5 for little over a year now and it's never out of my sight. I quite possibly have an addiction, I never leave home without out it. But whilst I have had it tightly grasped in my hands I've managed to find the perfect apps for almost everything. So I thought I'd share. I've also listed my preferred lightning cable at the bottom for people who are struggling with finding decent replacements for the apple ones...

These are my two home screens. I have most of the basic apps on here and then a couple extra, then most of my other apps are managed into folders. I'll give you a quick run down, on the left hand side:

• I'm on the three network and their handy 'THREE' app lets me check my bills, allowance and also has a game built in. 

• The 'BANKING' app allows me to make transfers, payments and use online banking from my phone because I am with barclays. It's such a life saver to be able to check your balance from your phone.

On the right hand side of my home screen: 

• 'THETRAINLINE' app allows me to check train departure and arrival times as well as platforms, and means I can buy all my train tickets from my phone. 

• 'PINGIT' is a barclay's app which allows you to send money to people only using their mobile number, which is really useful, I've spoken about it before. 

• 'COUNTDOWN+' is an app which gives you the days, minutes, seconds, etc. left until an event, such as your birthday or holiday, and you can sync it with facebook which is pretty cool.

• 'CHARADES!KIDS' takes the game of charades and makes it even more exciting. You hold your phone on your head and a word comes up on the screen that everyone else must then act out to you. It's great for when you're waiting for something, or car journeys, etc. 

• The 'GOPRO' app is a must have if you own a GoPro camera, or use one, if not it's probably pretty useless to you. It lets you control your GoPro over wifi (providing it's compatible). 

• 'DREAMY' is a dream journal. I've started writing my dreams down and they're pretty hilarious to look back on. 

• 'SHOEBOX' backs up all of my photos on my phone and laptop. It also shows me which photos I took on this day however many years ago, which is always very embarrassing, but funny. 

• And then my trusty 'BIBLE' app! No theology student should be without this, it had the bible in tons of versions and you can skip to the book and chapter that you need.

Utilities just contains all of the default apps which apple gives you. They're pretty boring. Find iPhone has been useful in the past though - I'd recommend downloading and setting it up, just in case!

Being able to shop from my bed/the sofa/the kitchen has really taken it's toll on my budget... lazy girl problems. 

• The 'EBAY' app notifies me when my watched items auction's have nearly finished, lets me browse ebay for whatever I'm looking for and means I buy so many things I definitely don't need.

• 'AMAZON' is much the same as ebay. I add things to my wishlist daily and purchase things from it all the time too. If you don't have amazon prime for students get it! Free six month trial!

• The 'PAYPAL' app allows me to check my PayPal balance wherever I am. It notifies me when payments have been taken and also allows me to purchase some things using the app and paying on PayPal... a bit like contactless payments. Only works in some places but it's pretty cool. If you're at UoB it works at most places on campus!

These are the apps I turn to when I'm bored or need to kill time. You've probably heard of them all before but I'll briefly run over what I use them for:

• If you have a netflix account the 'NETFLIX' app is a must have. It allows you to do most of the things you can whilst viewing on the web, just on a smaller screen. Pretty useful.

• 'YOUTUBE' allows me to search for videos, watch videos, catch up on my subscriptions, etc. all from my phone.

• 'VINE' I use less often but check every now and then. If you follow the right people you can find some pretty funny videos on there.

• 'BBC IPLAYER' lets you watch BBC programmes on your phone. Basically exactly like the website, I can catch up on programmes I missed.

All my social networking apps go in this folder, you've probably heard of most of them before so I won't go through them, apart from the 'THREE INTOUCH' app. If you are on the three network this app's a life saver. Basically it allows you to make/receive texts or phonecalls over a wifi network. Which is really great for if you don't have signal.

These are the apps I use to edit/crop photos for instagram. They all have their own benefits and downsides so I won't go through those but even after cutting down my apps these were the ones I was left with, so I'd recommend them all.

These are the apps I use for music. 

• On the left the 'KISS KUBE' app allows me to listen to Kiss radio on the go, over my internet connection. Kisstory is probably the best thing ever, I love it. 

• Then, 'SHAZAM' allows me to figure out the name and artist of a song just by playing it and getting the app to 'listen', which is pretty cool and useful too.

Finally, if you own an iphone 5, or later, you'll know that lightning phone chargers are the flimsiest pieces of technology in the world. Not only are they almost 90% likely to break, but they also cost an arm and a leg to replace, just look at the reviews on the apple website. I heard on the grapevine that if you take your cable to an apple store within a year of purchase they'll replace it - so clearly they know there's a problem. I gave up buying the £15-faulty-but-still-apple-genuine cable in favour of the amazon charger, I have the 6 foot one. I also stuck some Sugru on mine to make sure that it cannot physically break. #studentproblems

Giving Blood

If you're aged over 17 and weigh more than 7st 12lbs (50kg) then you should be able to give blood. It's so simple to find somewhere to donate and can all be done online, all you have to do is turn up, fill in a form & answer some questions, donate your blood and then have a cuppa' & some biscuits!

Plus, you can take embarrassing blood donation selfies, like me.

The blood.co.uk website is really easy to use and has all the details and answers to any questions you might have. All you need to do is create an account as a first time donor, or if you're already a donor you can log in/sign up. They then take a few details off of you, such as your address, and then you take a look for a venue which is having a blood donation session.

In terms of the actual donation I found it to be pretty easy, comfortable and not stressful. I used to be really afraid of needles (when I was little I punched a nurse who was trying to give me an inoculation), but the nurses at the blood donor session were very calm, friendly and helpful, which made me feel much more relaxed. Obviously if you are really afraid of needles I would not put yourself through this process!

That's all you need to know really, but remember that 25% of people need a blood donation at some point in their lives, yet only 4% of adults are donors. One donation of blood can help up to three people, so it really is worthwhile.

Being Cheated On

Infidelity is one of the most devastating things those in relationships might have to cope with. Not only is it a betrayal of trust but it single-handedly ruins a jointly built up foundation of a relationship. When someone in a relationship is unfaithful it often leads to people, unwittingly and not rightfully, feeling pity for the other person. Break ups are hard enough but when you add infidelity it can make them harder to cope with, and the added factor of everyone feeling sorry for you, makes them even more embarrassing.

18.3% of women & 25.4% of men have admitted to cheating on their current partner at least once (according to illicit encounters). Unfortunately, infidelity happens more often than you might at first realise, of course this isn't really that reassuring, but it does help to know that there are other people who have struggled through just like you have.

It sounds dumb to say it, but be thankful that you now know. Illicit encounters also found that 19% of British women & 30% of British men would cheat if they wouldn't get caught out. Whether your partner decided to actually tell you, or you just found out, at least now you know the truth.

 

Don't allow people to pity you; this wasn't your decision. It was a selfish decision solely made by someone else, but that had a huge effect on you. It's hard for people to understand something like this unless they've been through it themselves, and sometimes the natural reaction is pity for the 'victim' and anger at the other person. Feeling as if people are looking at you with pity can make you feel even worse. Don't allow people to feel sorry for you, and don't mope feeling sorry for yourself. Make a conscious effort to move forward with it.

If you do decide to forgive them you must truly ask yourself if it's worthwhile. If they've cheated on you, or others, in the past, this might be the sign of a vicious cycle. They've had a second chance already, there may be little point in you giving them another one. Was it a slip-up or was it a long-term affair? A one-off incident seems much more forgiveable than something which they kept from you for a long period of time. It feels much more like it could be a genuine mistake. Assess the quality of your relationship at the time of the infidelity. It may be easier to forgive if you were aware that your partner was unhappy at the time, than if you thought it was all plain sailing and happy days. Finally, do they regret what they have done? They should be more upset about the pain they have caused, than you are.

Make sure that if you do choose to forgive them that it is your decision. A lot of people are willing to put in their two cents when it comes to cheating, but you need to make this decision separate to their opinions. This is your choice. Don't allow yourself to feel guilty for making a different decision from the ones your friends would want you to make.

Finally, it's the biggest cliché but, time heals all wounds. Give yourself time and give it time.

Relationships At Uni

Relationships whilst at university are a difficult one. Juggling spending time with a significant other, doing work and having a social life can be tricky, but they're (mostly) worth the effort. Here are my top tips:

MAKE IT EQUAL: make sure that you are giving the same amount that you are receiving. Sometimes if you end up making more effort, spending more money or giving more time to a relationship, you begin to feel resentful towards the other person. Try and make sure that you both spend an equal amount of time at one another's houses, and if you go out on a date try and both pay for certain aspects, take it turns to pay or just pay for yourselves!

COMMUNICATION: people always say communication is key and they're right. Making sure that you keep up communications with your significant other is really important, but that doesn't mean that they have to be at your beckoned call all the time. Schedule skype sessions or phone calls and make sure that you keep to those allotted times, making time for one another is really important and you don't let them down, or feel let down yourself. Then again, don't expect them to reply to you instantly all the time, it's not realistic or healthy.

(credit)

MAKE THEM FEEL SPECIAL: the smallest things can make the biggest difference. Let them know you're thinking of them, listen to them and make time for them. It's easy to do something small, but thoughtful, for them and it will make them feel really appreciated.

ARGUE IT OUT: a lot of the time people are scared of arguments because they want to avoid conflict in a relationship, but I would say that they're good for them. If you have an argument you usually dispute over something which is important to the both of you, it allows you to put your opinion across and sometimes put things out there which you may have not necessarily spoken about otherwise. If you can argue without fear of someone over reacting and blowing things out of proportion then you should be able to resolve most disputes. Make sure that you don't go to bed angry with one another - try and resolve things before that, though sometimes it is good to sleep on it.

BALANCE IT WELL: as I said before, it can be hard to make time for a relationship when you have so many other things going on. Try and get the balance right. Make time for your significant other but try to not let it get in the way of uni and seeing your friends. Sometimes it helps to plan ahead and keep organised, that way you know when things start to compromise others. 

TRUST ONE ANOTHER: the foundation of a relationship should be trust. Trust is so important because without it you are left feeling jealous, suspicious and uncomfortable. Do your best to be a trustworthy person, and do your best to trust in your partner. Be honest with one another and own up to your mistakes, flaws and issues. 

Choosing A Second Year House

Most second year students decide to move out of halls and into houses for their subsequent years at university and there is usually a lot of choice when it comes to where you want to live.

We started to house hunt for our parents, the student houses were that nice...

CHOOSING THE RIGHT AREA. A lot of universities have an area where most of the second year students live, but this isn't the case with all unis. You will want to look at an area which already has a lot of students living in, that isn't too far away from campus and that is perhaps in an area you already know. Think about transport links or parking. Consider your price range and go from there.

CHOOSING TO RENT FROM THE UNIVERSITY OF FROM A PRIVATE LANDLORD. Some universities actually have student houses which you can rent directly from them. A university owned house is likely to be cheaper, and therefore within your price range, but is also usually less modern or as refurbished as other properties. Private landlords can come with risks but they also have benefits too. Although you will have to look for a house either online or through a lettings agent, which could come with fees, you are likely to get a more modern house.

HOUSES WITH NO SUMMER RENT. If you are able to find a house which doesn't have rent payable over the summer this could end up saving you a fair amount of money, you want to find a house with a nine month contract if this is the case. My housemates and I were lucky enough to find a house that was being renovated and refitted during the summer holidays, meaning we didn't have to pay summer rent and we would get new kitchens, bathrooms, furniture, etc. when we moved in! (This did prove to be a little bit of a disaster, but I'll post about that another time). Keep in mind that you don't get student loan payments over the summer months, but you may have to pay rent then.

BILLS INCLUDED. If you can find a house which has the household bills included in the rent this will save you a lot of hassle later on. The rent will obviously be more than a house which doesn't have bills included but could actually end up costing you less. You won't realise how much energy, internet or water you're using when you're in halls because you don't have to pay bills, they're usually included, but they can be pretty hefty and having them included in your rent will save you the worry of unexpected bills and ensures that the amounts are all split equally.

A REPUTABLE LETTINGS AGENT. We had quite a lot of difficulty when first looking at houses with a few lettings agents offering us the option of paying a 'holding fee' once we had decided on a house. Although there are perfectly honest lettings agents who let you do this the particular company we were dealing with turned out to be quite untrustworthy and we were glad we didn't go with them, or give them any money. Don't feel pressured into giving money over unless you are fully satisfied by what you are receiving, and what you are paying for. Sometimes agents try to put more pressure on you by emphasising how much interest they have had, or how little time you may have, although sometimes this may be true, don't allow it to force you to make a rash decision. If you start looking for houses early enough there will be plenty left with no need to rush or panic.

GET ADVICE FROM YOUR STUDENT UNION. If you are unsure on anything do go to your student union and ask them for help, that's what they're there for. They may be able to look over your house contract for you or provide a standard rental agreement contract for you to look over and compare with the contract you have been given to sign. They may be able to point you in the direction of a good lettings agent or help explain terminology that you don't understand.

And finally, don't panic. It's easy to start getting stressed out by your living arrangements for the next year. Whilst you're looking for a house you may see many others looking and the pressure of having to make a choice can be really hard. Make sure you keep up communication between your future housemates and everything will be fine. You want to enjoy searching for a house to live in, not be super stressed out!

Happy house hunting x

Choosing The Right Housemates

At a lot of universities you move out of halls at the end of your first year, and into a house for the remainder of your degree. This means leaving the flat that you shared throughout freshers and having to find a house to replace that flat. It also means that you have to make a decision about who you're going to live with. It's pretty scary stuff, but it's also really exciting.

The one thing we haven't worked out yet is how to get a nice photo of all of us.

Here are my dos and donts of second year housemates:

DO live with the same flatmates you had in first year if you all got along. It helps to live with someone that you've lived with before because you know one another's habits and what it is like living with one another. Even if you are bestest friends with someone, or get along with them, you don't know what your relationship with that person will be like when you're actually living with them.

DON'T live with someone you usually spend a lot of time with. If you end up living with someone you spend the majority of your time with you may find that you end up spending too much time with them, and that you don't get enough time for yourself. Although it can be useful to live with a coursemate (you can share books, discuss essays and help one another get up for lectures), you may end up feeling smothered because you cannot ever get away from that person.

DO live with people who you think are financially responsible. Finances and money are a big part of second year life. You may no longer have bills included in your rent, and therefore living with someone who you know will cough up money for bills is relieving. You don't want to be left in a situation where you're out of pocket because of someone else.

DON'T live with your boyfriend/girlfriend/significant other. Even if it's separate rooms. Just don't do it. I shouldn't even have to tell you but if something does happen which means that you are no longer together you will be living a life of misery tip toeing around them... You'll be living with your ex. It's a terrible idea, and your poor housemates will have to tip toe around you both too. Also, don't live with a couple.

DO live with people who have a similar sleeping pattern to you. This may sound weird but it's important. If you are someone who gets up really early and you're living with people who won't want to wake up until later you will have to tip toe around in the morning. Same if you are someone who likes to have really late nights, but your housemates don't share that, you will have to tip toe around at night.

DON'T panic. Don't make any rash decisions about who you're going to live with and end up in a house which isn't exactly ideal. As long as you are proactive and think carefully about whether living with certain people is a good idea or not, you should be fine. Don't rush into anything, think it through.

First Aid

There were quite a few times in my first year when people had a bit too much to drink and they needed looking after, but there were also other times were alcohol wasn't the problem and I had no idea how to help. After some quick googling and reading up on a few things I've got the low down.

PANIC ATTACKS: Panic attacks are part of the body's reaction to fear/excitement/stress and are a more common problem than you would first believe. When someone experiences a panic attack they can show a range of symptoms, these include: rapid or uncomfortable breathing, heightened heart rate, shaking and feeling faint. These symptoms usually last for between five to ten minutes, but can last longer, and leave the sufferer feeling panicked, as the name would suggest.

One way to help someone who is having a panic attack is to try and help them regain normal breathing. You can do this by making them breathe with you, you could start by breathing in for two seconds and out for two and then slowly increase this until they are breathing normally.

Another way to help is to reassure them. Keep calm and let them know that they are safe. Although what they are experiencing is scary, there is no danger, you will look after them and they will get through the attack.

Finally, ask them if there is anything they need or anything you can do for them. Don't assume that they need something, ask them. 

ALCOHOL POISONING: Sometimes alcohol can lead to someone becoming out of control of their own body and in situations like this they may need your help. If someone is vomiting, breathing irregularly, unconscious or conscious but not responding then they may be suffering from alcohol poisoning.

If someone is showing signs of alcohol poisoning, try to keep them awake and sitting up. Give them water to drink if they can and keep them warm. Stay with them and monitor their symptoms and how severe they are. If they have passed out then check their breathing and put them into the recovery position.

Don't leave them to just sleep it off or force them to vomit. Don't put them in a cold shower or allow them to drink anymore alcohol. 

If their symptoms are worsening or are not improving then seek help, and/or ring the emergency services.

DRINK SPIKING: If someone has put something into your drink that you were unaware of it could leave you in really dangerous situation. Symptoms of having your drink spiked include: loss of balance, blackouts, nausea, vomiting and blurred vision. 

If you are worried that yours, or someone elses, drink has been spiked find someone you trust such as a close friend, relative, medical professional or the police. Get them/yourself to a safe place but be wary of strangers and do not leave with someone you don't know. 

If you/they feel unwell then you/they need to be taken to A&E. Tell them that you think your/their drink has been spiked and arrange for friends/relatives to take you/them home and stay with you/them until the drugs have fully left your/their system.

Also, try and report it to the police as soon as possible, as most drugs leave the body within 72 hours of being taken.

AN OVERDOSE: An overdose occurs when someone takes more of a substance than is recommended for human consumption, this could be accidental or purposeful. Signs of an overdose include: empty pill packets or missing pills, vomiting, difficulty breathing, lack of coordination or unconsciousness. 

If you believe that someone has overdosed then try and find out what they took and how much, don't leave them on their own and monitor their symptoms. Call an ambulance straight away and don't let them drink or eat anything. Don't let them sleep, encourage them to throw up or try and put them under a shower.

If you're in doubt about any of these things you can ring the NHS direct on 111 to ask for advice, or if it is an emergency ring 999 immediately.

These situations all sound pretty scary but unfortunately they do happen and it's better to be prepared!

My University Room

Making your room your own at university is one of the best things you can do to help you settle in and to make you feel less homesick. As a second year student living in a house, I have more flexibility with the decoration of my room, and it's made me go a bit home-ware crazy.

The main theme of my room is the colour red. I happened to by some red & white polka dot heart bed sheets and then decided that everything else had to be red and white themed. 

 From left, clockwise:

POLAROIDS - I got lots of polaroid style photos printed online from square snaps (27 photos for £9.99) and I'm going to hang a piece of string on the wall and then clip them onto the string with these cute little heart pegs (£1.15 for a pack of 20).

BEDSHEETS - these striped sheets are from the IKEA DVALA range and cost only £20 for a double set.

LAMP - my lamp is also from IKEA. It's handy because it clips onto the shelves behind my bed and also has a bendy neck so I can point it in any direction I want. It was £10.

PINBOARD - so I may have slightly cheated in that the picture of the photo frame above isn't the one I ordered but it looks pretty similar. I got mine off ebay for £9.99.

My Second Year House

My five housemates & I have finally moved into our second year house, and whilst we were settling in I took some cheeky photos of the place to pop into a blog post (also to show to my Gran).

When we came to look at the house back in November, nearly a year ago now, it looked pretty different. One of the bedrooms was a smaller size, the kitchen was smaller and the bathrooms were in different places. Our landlord has chosen to renovate the house over the summer, for us to move in September. Unfortunately, there were major delays with the house that lead to it not being ready in time for our 15th September move in date, and we were put into temporary accommodation whilst they finished the house, which we moved in to on 8th October (it's a very long story).

However, now that we are moved in we are all so happy with our rooms, the house in general and that we actually have a house! 

Just to give you an idea of just how un-ready the house was when I came up to Birmingham on the date I was supposed to move in. That's the kitchen and the downstairs bathroom.

The house is now mostly finished, although there are some things which need tweaking and other things which still haven't been fitted.

This is one of our upstairs bathrooms.

Another upstairs bathroom - the one that I use.

The kitchen, with a tumblr drier which is still to be fitted into the utility room.

And the living room.

Overall, a pretty decent house, especially for students. The house has six bedrooms and three bathrooms, over three floors, and the big kitchen is perfect for all of us.

Referencing & Plagiarism

Referencing is probably the bane of every university student's life. I still don't really understand it. But there's pretty much no way around it, you will have to reference. Luckily for you I've figured out some tips & tricks to make those pages of sources a little easier to manage.

In any essay you write you must list the sources behind your ideas & quotes. You have to give credit to the original authors of these ideas in order to not get done for plagiarism (stealing their ideas). It's pretty scary to begin with actually, your university will probably put a lot of emphasis on how important it is to not plagiarise, and with good reason too. But don't be scared, referencing isn't quite as hard and confusing as it may seem when you have the internet on your side. 

Firstly, know your referencing system. There are a fair few and different universities & schools use different ones. The way in which you reference depends upon which system you are supposed to use. So it's pretty important that you know which style you are aiming for, you may even lose credit for using the wrong system. Being (basically) a joint honours student I had the lovely task of having to learn two different referencing systems - one for each school, so I learnt how to 'cheat' my way through pretty quickly.

Neil's toolbox is an online referencing generator which you can use to create bibliographies and references. Okay so you do still have to put in the hard work of finding all of the sources but you just have to enter the details about that source, such as the author's name or the book you got it from, into the Harvard Reference Generator, and it will produce the reference for you. Pretty handy if you're referencing lots of sources - it does, of course, only work if you are supposed to be using the Harvard system.

Another online referencing problem solver I found myself referring back to time & time again was the University of Leeds' library's guide to Harvard Referencing. This page lists all of the problems that you might come across whilst trying to reference, such as how to reference a DVD or what to do if there is more than two authors, and tells you how to rectify them. Again, this is probably only helpful if you are using the Harvard Referencing system - but I have had a look and they do seem to list other systems here, so you may find the one you are supposed to use.

The key thing to referencing is to make sure when you're researching for an essay that you keep hold of the information of that source, whether it be from a book or from a webpage. This will make it much easier to put in your references when you start writing your bibliography and save you desperately trying to figure out who said what.

Don't panic, universities put a lot of emphasis on plagiarism and whilst it is important it is also easy to avoid. Good luck & happy essay writing! xx

Break Ups

Something that I did find in the first few months of uni was that there were a lot of break ups. Distance, as well as a completely fresh start, took its toll on a lot of relationships. Don't get me wrong, it wasn't like everyone had split, but it was definitely something that I noticed. But luckily for all of you, if you are going through a break up, or you know people that are, I have the perfect advice and pointers which I've figured out from all of the struggles my friends and I experienced in our first year.

1. DONT GET MAD, OR EVEN. Sometimes when our feelings get hurt our first reaction is to act out and reciprocate that. Though I know the temptation out there is to hurt someone as much as they've hurt you, I've found that this just makes things much more messy. You may think that making them feel the same way they made you feel is a way to show them how wrong they've been, but what's more likely to happen is that you hurt yourself in the process and cause a whole lot of drama, which isn't needed.

2. DON'T TEXT THEM. Try to keep yourself busy, surround yourself with friends and give yourself less alone time than normal. This would be the perfect opportunity to join a new society or take up a new hobby. Instead of watching Netflix on your own, watch it with a flatmate. Being on your own gives you an excuse to over-think and dwell on things, it will lead to you not only feeling lonely but also over analysing everything, which will only drive you crazy. And whatever you do, don't contact them.

3. SOCIAL MEDIA WOES. To make it easier for yourself you may want to remove yourself from social media, or block/delete them from it. You don't want to end up posting cringey year 9-esque tweets about what could have been, and you don't want to find yourself being a creepy stalker. If it's rude to block or delete them just hide them from your newsfeed to prevent the temptation!

4. MATES BEFORE DATES. Friends are the perfect people to keep you happy, keep you distracted and to keep you from getting lonely. Don't rely on them, but make sure you that you keep them close. Ask them for advice if you need it, because they'll have your best interests at heart. Whether that's new university friends or your old friends from home.

5. STAY SOBER. Most freshers will be thinking I'm crazy telling you to not drink, but in my experience alcohol is likely to not help this situation. There is the temptation to go mad on a night out with your friends, but with alcohol being a depressant the likely outcome is that the night will end in tears. Tears, fighting or drunk dialling, all of which you want to avoid. Save yourself for a big night which you are really looking forward to, rather than just going out for the sake of it.

6. MORE FISH IN THE SEA. Ok, so it's probably a little bit early to start looking for someone else, but that doesn't mean that you can't check people out, right? After all, everyone moves at their own pace, and trust me, there will be a lot of eye-candy on campus. Enjoy single life, and the benefits it brings with it. Besides, now's the perfect time to get closer with that person from two blocks down that you were eyeing up the day you moved in. I'm not saying you have to find someone else straight away, but knowing that there are other great people out there is something that will help you to move on.

Finally, whilst there were lots of break ups there were an equal amount of new relationships or relationships that stayed strong. Don't think that because you're at University your relationship is doomed to fail, it's not the case at all.

Everyone is different, so even if something works for someone else it may not be the same case for you. If you do have any other good pieces of advice comment them below for people to read, and to everyone else, good luck! xx

(A big thanks to Jen for helping me edit this post and decide what to include!)